This is where I think, pray & process out loud. I’d love for you to join me on the journey. Please chime in on the conversation by leaving your thoughts and comments! Subscribe to my blog http://shannonwexelberg.com/blog/feed
There’s a reason God (via Paul) reminds us in Romans 8 that “Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ”. It’s not just a nice platitude or a Scripture we have etched on a plaque on our desktop. No, the truth is, we need to be reminded.
It’s fairly easy for me to accept that external things like “hunger, earthquakes, angels, demons & creation” can’t separate me from His love – though, I confess, I haven’t been faced with everything on that list. But these are forces outside of me – things beyond my control – things for which I can’t feel guilt or condemnation personally.
But Paul goes on to list “fears for today” and “worries for tomorrow” as part of this list as well. And honestly, it’s these internal inadequacies more so than the external forces that most make me question His love. Why? Because I feel I am in control of those, and I am somehow failing to measure up.
For the last six months or more, I’ve been in a difficult place. Not a difficult physical place, but a place of internal wrestling and anguish. I’m not going to go into detail here – maybe someday – but let’s just say it’s been an extremely painful season.
It’s not someplace I would have chosen to go intentionally, but a place I believe God has led me and wants me to walk through. I confess, however, that it hasn’t been pretty. Inside (and some outside) I’ve kicked and screamed, I’ve asked “why”, I’ve wondered if the journey will be worth it. And I’ve questioned the depths and consistency of His love for me.
But that’s exhausting. And one day recently, I got tired of it, and I hung all that up.
No, I didn’t hang up the process. I didn’t hang up my faith. But I hung up my concern that His love would dry up, get fed up, and walk away from me. I knew I needed to go where I needed to go, and that was to the depths of some places I hadn’t gone before. There was no other option. I couldn’t turn back.
So I turned to Him and said, “Lord, I have to let myself free-fall here. I’m not going to try to gussy myself up, pretend things are OK, stuff the hard stuff away for another time. I’m spreading my arms out and letting go. And, well, I hope You’ll be there.”
Even after nearly a lifetime of walking with Him, I wasn’t sure what He’d think or do in those moments. This was different than anything else I’d felt or faced.
But here’s what happened next. He didn’t turn His head in dismay or disgust when I fell into these deeper canyons of questioning and pain. He didn’t think less of me.
No. He followed me there.
He IS continuing to follow me. He is shadowing me – hovering over me and all around me. I never had to hold myself together at all. He is not afraid of the most hidden or most unhealed parts of us. In fact, the opposite is true. He calls to those places. I think the magnet of His love pulls the pieces of my brokenness toward His heart.
So, today, maybe you’ve been trying to hold it together – hoping God or someone else might not notice the pain oozing out of every crack of you. It may feel too raw and exposed to let that part show through – people sometimes can’t handle it. Maybe they’ve even mishandled your pain.
But God. He won’t. He never asks us to present the prettiest package of ourselves to Him, only to retreat later and peel off the layers in disgust. He longs to apply a balm of healing as our wounds get exposed to the breeze of His presence.
He says to us – “Nothing can separate you from my love….nothing outside of you and nothing inside of you. I will love you fully and unceasingly – no matter what depths you must experience in order to discover this is fully true.”
No matter how long the journey, how dark the cavern, or how far or frightening the free fall, I have to believe it will be worth it.
I know He thinks it is.
Perfect Love can handle a free-fall. I know. I still feel the wind whipping against my face.
How is He asking you to free-fall and trust His love today?
I am recovery from shoulder sugery, my husbsnd a recent hip replacement( hes 52 not 82) and he has a shoulder surgery coming up feb 5. Our finances are a huge mess and yer ee are sustained by His grace. I have learned to do what I can do but that I have to trust Him to do the rest. Is it fun? No. Exhausting…yes…but daily I surrender the trials and frustration to Him and His grace really is is sufficient. Im learning He is trust worthy.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:37 pm
Sandi…it sure can be exhausting – you’re right – walking this journey of trust! I pray He provides ALL you need according to HIS riches and glory and for encouragement to your heart as you continue walking. Blessings to you this coming year.
This is so true! I think He longs for us to be real with ourselves so we can be truly real with Him. When I’m hiding parts of me (even from myself, if that makes sense) I can’t be completely bare before Him. I love the healing that comes when I allow God to finally access the parts of me I thought were unlovable and unhealable (new word!). He is so faithful! Praise God for the journey He has you on…looking forward to the songs that will come out of this place 😉
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:35 pm
Dena – I think “unhealable” sounds like a good new word. And I think it’s easy for us to hide from ourselves and not even realize it. You’re right, there’s such freedom and healing that comes when we finally just lay it all out there. Lord, help us continue to do so.
Thanks so much for you blog. I too have gone through some hard times this past year and your thoughts have helped me.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:34 pm
So glad, Mary. Praying for His strength to infuse you as you enter this new year.
Wow, Shannon, you have experienced some things that I have gone through before and even recently… I did a “free fall” and yes, there were good times, very bad times, but through it all I have known He was there with me in it…. He is bringing me out on the other side.. AMEN
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 9:17 amThank you for your transparency. I often feel like everyone else has it all together and I’m barely hanging on. So thankful that God has a secure hold on us so we can free fall.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 9:18 am” the magnet of His love pulls the pieces of my brokenness toward His heart.”
He is HOPE for the broken. He is LIGHT in the Dark Night of the Soul. Lover of my soul, my Saviour, my Redeemer…my Jesus
Wow! Exactly what I needed to hear!!
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:32 pm
YAY! So grateful the Lord spoke to you, Sara. Blessings to you, dear sister!
Shannon, what a blessing this post is! I can identify with your pain, and I’ve been there these past months. My kids are grown and (mostly) in and out. My Dad has had medical issues. When did my parents start getting old???? Agonizing over possible retirement (Am I that old???) Feeling like God is moving us to another church? It has been a year of turmoil and change. And the biggest stress of all – “If I were really grounded in my faith, wouldn’t I be able to trust during this time?”
So I give you my thanks, because your humility and candor has blessed me today. We are still human and fallible. And God loves us still!
Praying for Both of us! Thanks for your ministry!
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:31 pm
Thank you, Linda! What an encouragement you are. It sounds like you are in the midst of lots of changing and shifting, and I think it’s so normal to feel unsettled by that, in spite of how long we’ve walked with Him! I pray for an extra measure of grace and patience through these transitions. Thanks so much for your prayers. Blessings!
Amazingly honest and heartfelt. It would seem dropping the facade in God’s presence would come naturally, yet it’s even more difficult than dropping it in front of friends. Maybe someday I’ll get there.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:30 pm
Adam…I think it’s always a process. Sometimes we are able to do it, and other times we want to hide. It sounds like Gods already giving you an honest perspective! Bless you.
Love your raw vulnerability here Shannon. I’ve been free falling too but I gotta admit that it is more like bungee jumping than diving off a cliff in a parachute suit and trusting God completely. I keep bouncing back to the same cliff only to have to gain the courage to jump all over again. I’m going to pray a dangerous prayer this year and ask for the tether to be gone. Ahhhhhh!! Did I just say that?! Yes. Tether or no thether, He goes there with me. Thanks for the reminder friend.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:29 pm
I love you, sweet Kathy. And I love your metaphor! And yes, you DID just say that. Can I hold you to it? But you’re right…either way and wherever we are in the process, He is there constantly loving and supporting us. Grateful we’re on this journey together.
Thank you for reminding me that nothing can separate from His love. No matter that I have strayed away some, his love for me is faithful! He is calling me back to a closer relationship with Him… My first love.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:27 pm
That’s wonderful, Maria! And you’re right…He is faithful even when we are faithless. So grateful he is calling you back and you are responding.
I too Shannon have had a tough year. Finding out something that happened to me as a child by a person in trust, I cant say more but I am still working through it and was totally crushed…. But I know how much my Heavenly Father loves me and wants the best for me, so that is what I focus on daily. I just turned 60 last October and somewhere after that it was revealed to me…. Thank you for your encouragement!!
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:27 pm
Janine…oh, I’m so sorry for the crushing pain you have experienced this last year. I imagine that it continues to be a process of healing. Your choice to focus DAILY on His heart for you is such a wise and critical choice, and I pray He continues to give you a vision of how deep and wide His love is (and always has been) for you. Thank you so much for sharing your heart.
What a great reminder. I have / am living this right now. Learning, forgetting and learning again how deep His love and grace and mercy are. It’s li ke you read my thought and put them on paper. Our God is so much bigger and better than we can even begin to imagine. Amazing!
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:23 pm
Amen, Vanessa! We have such a limited view of his Amazing-ness (if that’s a word!). I pray He shows each of us more and more in the days to come.
Love your courageous heart and how you share it in your words……….thank you. You have to have courage to be able to “en”courage.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 9:51 amWow, Shannon!
I too have been experiencing some inner turmoil, feeling like at any one moment, a breath, a look will send me over the edge. I have been trusting Him that he will see me thru this time, he will guide me, love me, comfort me and forgive me. Thank you for reminding me how strong and beautiful His love is for me.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:21 pm
I’m so grateful you were reminded today of all He is and will be for you, even in that raw, fragile state. May you continue to be aware of How much he loves you every moment and in every season.
I’ve been experiencing a “cleansing” of sorts. God showed me things deep in my heart that I guess I had hidden not only from Him but myself. It’s uncomfortable and painful. But I guess it was necessary so that I can move forward and fully surrender everything to Him. And I mean EVERYTHING! It hasn’t been easy but I never ever felt alone. In fact this time has shown be how faithful and loving He is. He has reassured me that He loves me even when there are times when I don’t love myself so much. Our God is a compassionate, merciful and gracious father. His love will never change and I guess it’s these times that remind me of that.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:19 pm
Amen, Teresa! What an encouraging word for all of us who are on that path of surrender! Thanks for posting.
What a blessing this post is. What I needed to be reminded off at this season in my life. What a year of growth and change and uncertainty this has been and no one but my Lord to share my inner thoughts and struggles with. You captured my heart perfectly.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:18 pm
Thanks, Tricia. May you be so aware of Him and His love in the face of your uncertainty. Blessings to you.
If you want to hear real worship songs, you must have Shannon’s music
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 10:29 amYour words and sharing openly have so blessed me. This has been the exact place I have found myself in 2013 as well. My confession has been, “I’m falling into His Grace.” Lots of uncertainty around us in every way, but I’m so grateful for God’s peace that passes all understanding and the REST that comes in leaning on Him wholly. Thanks for sharing! Many blessings and OPEN DOORS for you in 2014!!
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:17 pm
Thanks, Marcia! So true. Without His peace, I would be a real mess! Blessings to you in 2014 too! Keep on falling into grace.
Thank you for opening up your thoughts and heart to us.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 11:13 amShannon…thanks for your honesty. I think it will help many of us to just “free-fall” into the strong arms of the Lord!
I just lost a special friend of 34 years to cancer, and I am missing her, and wanting to be there for her family.
My husband and I took in two of our teen age grandsons recently, and at 63 and 68 our lives are about to change in a big way. This involves money…and trusting God as to where it will come from…as well as sacrifice… and requires putting ourselves, and our needs second to theirs. We are willing…and happy to do that. But praying each day for strength and for us to live out what we preach!
We are wanting to help our daughter and her four kids…and the timing of it all is out of our control…God will definitely have to lead us and show us the way, step by step. We just have to be willing to “do the next thing!”
Our quiet times alone with God are very necessary…and yet we seem to be having them less often. We need to be totally yielded to Him during this time. As you said…”No matter how long the journey, how dark the cavern, or how far or frightening the free fall, I have to believe it will be worth it.”
May God be very near and very loving as you go through this time. (And also with us.)
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:16 pm
Thank you, Linda! Wow, you are definitely on an adventure! But it sounds like you are staying in step with Him and trusting Him at each turn. I pray He continues to direct, encourage, provide and sustain you as you take on these big changes. You are an inspiration. Blessings to you!!
Thank you for sharing your journey, Shannon! From what I have heard, many seem to be enduring a season of challenge, deep heartache, and searching for God’s plan in this broken world. This past year has been difficult, and I am in that place of giving up… giving up on hopes and dreams that I have carried most of my life. During this season, it is incredibly difficult to celebrate with my friends as they announce their “exciting news”, and I admit I am failing miserably. I do ask the question “GOD, Why not me?”, and then a long string of other questions. Praying for answers, but HE seems incredibly silent.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:14 pm
Kaye…thanks so much for being so honest. Those seasons can be so confusing and disheartening. The times of not hearing from Him can be incredibly unsettling. I pray He makes Himself known to you soon and encourages your heart as only He can do. In the mean time, I pray for comfort and grace as you endure these challenges. He can handle our “why not me’s?” – I’ve had my share of those too! Blessings, dear sister.
I agree that even though we are in God or have been following Gods plan for us all our life we never stop learning or relearning the lessons that He “is” always with us even when we don’t know or think so in our life. Trust is one of the lessons I need to constantly remind myself to do in all things as even Jesus said “… none the less not my will but your will be done”. Blessing to you Shannon.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:09 pm
So true, Horacio. I guess we never stop learning to trust Him in deeper and deeper ways. I’m grateful for that, even though sometimes it’s a challenging road to get there. Bless you!
“When the night is long…” Cling brings me a lot of comfort…sounds as if you are in a time to put the words to this song to good use. Thanks for sharing your talent with us. Will be praying for you.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:03 pm
Ah, yes….there have been times I’ve had to sing back to myself something I’ve written! Or I’ve had friends sing the words to me because I happened to forget. Thank you for taking the time to post! Blessings to you.
I read somewhere that when you,re waiting for the next door to open, praise Him in the hall.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 12:45 pmThank you so much for posting! In the past week I’ve been learning this same lesson – that God does not want beautifully wrapped packages, but rather a deep faith as we fall.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 12:49 pmOur 31 yr old son and only child went to be with Jesus
8 mo ago. He was studying to be in ministry and preaching. God confirmed three times He called our son and he ran after God. Your songs have been such a blessing to me. The first week I played Jehovah Shalom many times every day and God gave me peace
I still feel like I am in “free fall” or “new normal”. God is faithful but it is still VERY hard. Thank you for sharing yor ministry with us.
Bev
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 7:01 pm
Oh, Bev…I am so very sorry for your great loss. I can only imagine how incredibly difficult your journey must be right now – and difficult to understand, I would think. I pray you will continue to find deep and abiding “shalom” as you walk out this new normal. Thank you for sharing part of your story with me…I feel incredibly honored to have had the Lord use my song in your heart as you grieved the earthly loss of your son. Blessings to you, dear Bev.
What a sweet blessing you are! We love your albums and voice! We saw you first on Day of Discovery! Miss their program on Sunday mornings. God bless!
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 1:27 pmI appreciate your sharing and being open and honest with how you feel. I too have had these same feelings and thoughts this last year. It has been for me several difficult years, but God always lets me know that He is with me and loves me and I am so grateful for His grace and His mercy! May God bless you Shannon and take delight in you!!!
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:55 pm
Thank you, Nikki! I appreciate you writing and acknowledging your struggle too. So grateful His presence has been so evident in your life! Blessings to you too!
Yes! Oh how we need the courage shared with us by sisters who have gone before us. There is freedom in the “free fall” <3 Thank you for a great blog and beautiful music
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:54 pm
Thanks, Nina! It does fill us with courage when we share the journey together!
Transparency is such an amazing thing. I find myself struggling each day with “trying to pull up my boot straps and put on that happy face for God” when really what I want to do is sit and sometimes cry. This is a baffling season and I have such fears. Leaning into hope and wanting to camp out fully on belief, but I’m scared. What if He doesn’t answer? Or worse, what if things just continue on and nothing happens? I need a good free fall and although those around me have been gracious after a while they’re ready to move on as well. Yet I’m still here in this place. Thanks for the reminder that We cannot be separated from Him. Here’s to honest emotions in hopes He will meet me on free fall. Hugs Shannon
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:54 pm
Heidi…yes, here’s to honesty in the struggle. I pray He gives you the courage to hope right in the face of the fear and doubt, and not feel like you have to wait until that’s resolved in order to take a leap. He will meet you – maybe not exactly in the way you expect – but He will. And I know for me, most of the time when I let myself free-fall, I am in the midst of struggling to believe and have nothing resolved. My “leap” is an expression of my desperation to find Him. I know the journey is different for every one of us, and I pray you meet Him in the very way you most need to find Him. Blessings, dear sister.
Amen! Great to be reminded of His love for us, even when we are in a free fall
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 2:08 pmI was blessed to get to lead “All Your Promises Are True” this morning during church. It’s just one of the songs that you have written that God has used to touch my heart and remind me of the Truths that He has promised. He IS strength for the journey and hope for the hopeless. Thank you for letting Him speak through you.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:44 pm
How cool, Brittany! So glad you got to minister that song this morning and so grateful it has touched your heart. I wrote that during a time when I needed to be reminded of that truth myself. Grateful He’s using it in your life (and your church) too! Blessings to you!
Shannon, it’s so refreshing to hear of others trials, knowing we are not alone and that God has not forsaken us even though he sometimes chooses to allow trials to enter our lives. I’m sure all of us have been through dark times in our walk with God, but knowing He never leaves us or forsakes us and that these trials are to make us more like Christ, helps us get through them.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:42 pm
You’re right, Deanne…it is comforting to know we are not alone in the struggle and that we never, ever will be. I’m not sure how I’d cope if I didn’t know that truth.
This is what God dropped into my heart when I was going through the pain of my marriage disintegrating: “No tear goes unused by the Father…each etches “God troughs” in our being; the more tears, the deeper and wider they become…the conduit for His healing balm to flow through to our hearts, and back out again, to bless and comfort others.” JWT Thank you for sharing!! <3
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:41 pm
Ahhhhh….such a good metaphor! I love that. I’m sorry for the pain you have walked through, Jennice, but so grateful He has given you a glimpse of His heart to comfort you and others even through that heartache. Bless you!
This is why your music has touched me and so many in my church. You have allowed God to minister to you and in return you pour yourself out in song and words to minister to others. We go through many seasons in life and while I can’t say that I enjoy going through them, I wouldn’t take nothing for the things He has taught me and the growth He so patiently rewarded me with. Difficult times are just blessings in disguise. Thank you for blessing me through your music and sharing your heart with the world. God Bless You!
Num. 6:24-26
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:38 pm
So true, Donna. We may wrestle in the midst of the trial and hate every minute of it. But the fruit from those seasons is irreplaceable and couldn’t come any other way. Bless you in 2014! Thanks for writing!
It is so wonderful to listen to your music which contains so much of your journey with God…and how He has been faithful to you. Many blessings to you as you continue on this walk of faith…and encourage us all along the way!
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 4:08 pmMy wife and I have been married since August 18th 2013. We are both committed Christians with a great love for the lord. But at times we have a fiery and sometimes hurtful blow up that stems from the enemy niggling away at an area of our lives that is vulnerable and painful. Recently I was left feeling hurt and vulnerable after opening up emotionally about this problem and felt crushed by her response. For 2 days I wandered aimlessly around the house in a fit of depression and withdrew into my self where I was screaming at God to help me to understand what was happening. I was angry, abusive towards him, in such a dark place that I couldn’t feel his love and felt abandoned. I finally broke don in tears and begged God to help me. I opened up and spoke all the pain and hurt I was feeling and spoke of things that I have held deep within me that I never wanted to come to light. It was then I saw an image in my mind of me struggling to lift my hand to God and I saw his hand in front of my face. He had reached down to lift me from my despair. I felt renewed and forgiven and learned a lesson from the emotional turmoil my wife and go through. We are purified through fire which are the troubles and worries of this world. But as with all purifying processes there are times when we need to go through the next process of purification. Sometimes the fire seems hotter than last time but what comes out the other end is a stronger and purer metal and that’s what these trials are. God’s process of letting us go through the flames to become stronger and better able to serve our God who is forever faithful. Through the blood of Jesus we can stand in righteousness before God and plead our case. In humbleness We declare his glory and power and express our love and pain to him knowing that the blood has washed us clean. It leaves me awe struck to think that the God who created all things called my name before he even started to set the stars in place and create the earth. Faithful God. All praise and glory to Jesus our saviour.
shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:36 pm
Thank you for your transparency, Steve. It sounds like God gave you an amazing picture of His grace in the midst of the fire. I love that. May He continue to cause you and your wife to grow stronger in Him and closer as the years ebb by. Blessings to you in 2014.
Thankful you use your talents for His glory. May hearts and lives turn to Jesus and others be encouraged.
By His grace we are hinged
Great word. The Lord never ceases to amaze me.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 6:09 pmGod is so good. He is in total control.
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 7:49 pmI am a jogger, or I try to be one… Hitting the road is my alone time with my ABBA FATHER. We talk the first couple of miles. And then I listen to music, many of your songs Shannon. This past year I have learned SO MUCH! I have also been through a difficult and painful year
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 8:08 pmOne incident has really made an impact on me. Once I went for a jog desperate for answers from God, crying so much that I could not see the road clearly…I looked down as I did not want people to see me crying, I stumbled and almost fell. It is then when I heard that loving voice tell me to look up…not to listen to the great deceiver … Look up and hold on to I AM because He is the ONE that hears our voices, our cries, sees the hurt, feels our pain…
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 8:17 pm
Amen, Karen! Such a good word and reminder to “lift our eyes to where our help comes from.” Happy jogging!
I love your heart and pray that you continue to simply trust Him … His love for you is boundless ….
This comment was posted on January 5, 2014 at 10:21 pmWow…through your experience you have touched my heart. Thank you for sharing. As a woman/mother I try so hard to keep things in as to not expose myself. Sometimes I feel the same….If I would just fall and let allgo, will God catch me?…thanks again, you are truly a blessing through your songs. I enjoy singing them at church.God bless you
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 7:46 am
Kristin…thanks so much for writing. The Lord often has to remind me that the thought the I am actually in control or can hold it all together is all an illusion anyway! So, letting go – I guess – is more me finally just making that admittance. Blessings on your 2014 and as a Mom!
Thank you for posting this Shannon. I think this news is so relevant with everything that keeps going on. God bless you, your family, and your ministry.
This comment was posted on January 6, 2014 at 4:30 pmShannon, thank you for being real and open about your struggles and sharing them with others. It takes real courage and strength! Your writings and songs often expresses what I’m experiencing and encourages me to keep pressing on despite the pain, difficulties and obstacles I may be going through. You’ve been such a blessing to me through the years! God bless you and your family!
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 8:18 pm
Thank you, dear Rhonda! What an encouraging word. I pray the Lord continues to encourage and strengthen you as well in 2014. Blessings!
Love your music and I would be blessed to win a C.D.
Thanks~
Thanks for sharing your heart, Shannon! We have been through some rough financial times; just when we thought we were getting our heads up a bit, three major things broke in our house! Have to keep trusting that God was not surprised by all this and He is in control, not me!
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 8:20 pm
So sorry about the broken things in your house, Marilyn! That’s so frustrating. I remember when Mark was unemployed for over a year after his accident and God kept having to re-remind me that He is Jehovah Jireh no matter what – not just because all my ducks are lined up in a row. Trusting with you that HE will provide! Sending love!
After all the pain then We don’t realize it during the pain that he is on our prescription not the world prescription but the prescription of his love and care that heals us
This comment was posted on January 6, 2014 at 4:48 pmI forgot to comment on your blog.
I so needed to read this today. I am hanging on and still fighting. I need to let go but oh so hard.
Thanks Shannon~
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 8:21 pm
It is so hard, Annie – the letting go. He will get you there when it is time….in the mean time just being willing to be made willing is a great place to start! Bless you…
Sometimes during that pain you can actually stop and sometimes that pain can be prolong through the years And each year you realize who you are closer with God and what he is what he can do and you can’t let Him go nothing else will pull you away
This comment was posted on January 6, 2014 at 4:53 pmThank you may Friend for sharing I just know that God always gets us back from derailments whether it several times but he gets Us back and that’s what counts Back to letting him love us Through want ever it may be and us loving him.
This comment was posted on January 6, 2014 at 4:57 pmTrusting God with my kids is hard. I love them so much and I know He loves them more but my heart breaks as I think of the choices they’re making and how painful the consequences will be long term.
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 8:23 pm
Ariele! I think that’s definitely one of the hardest areas – our kiddos. Thank God HE loves them more and is more concerned for them than even we are. But still…some days that isn’t as reassuring as I’d like it to be. Bless you, dear sister!! Hope our paths cross in person again sometime!!
Ariele O'Brien Reply:
January 7th, 2014 at 6:29 am
We were almost stationed in CO last move, but our orders were deleted just two weeks prior to our move. I do hope our paths cross again before Heaven.
On the way to church this past Sunday, I told my 13-year-old daughter I’d been crying. “Why, Daddy?” she asked.
My father-in-law went into the hospital on New Years’ Day. His wife has advanced Alzheimer’s, so we moved in with her while he’s still away. This is not the first time we’ve had to do this: the last time was when we lost our own house to mold. My daughter has seen her father struck by lightning and taken away in an ambulance; she’s nearly lost her mother; she lost her puppy and her house and all her toys and books. Now, when we finally have a house of our own again, we have to move back in with Mom. Will she lose everything all over? I said to her, “I cried because it’s hard for all of us. It’s hard for Grandpa in the hospital. It’s hard for Grandma because she doesn’t understand where he is. It’s hard for Mommy because it tires her out. It’s very hard for you”–and she nodded–“and even for me. So I cried.”
“But it’s Jesus’ job to make bad things good,” I continued, and she agreed. “That doesn’t make it any easier, though, does it?” She agreed with that, too. And that’s where we left it, smiling at each other.
shannon Reply:
January 6th, 2014 at 8:26 pm
Vince…what a precious story of these moments of authenticity with your daughter. It sounds like you all have been facing a lot as a family, and I’m so sorry for the ongoing struggle. It’s so wonderful that your daughter gets to see her Dad cry and show vulnerability. I think that’s a treasure. Praying for you and your family as you traverse these choppy waters ahead. Not easy, you’re right….but gratefully, you are not doing it alone. Blessings, Vince. Thank you for your post.
Thank you for your transparency. Transparency is a definite necessity for living life to its fullest. . Being honest, even about our struggles can only lead to growth as we reach out for help. James 5:16 tells us that we are to confess our weaknesses to one another and pray for one another that we may be healed. Thank you for confession and sharing. Please know that I will be praying for you and would like to covet your prayers as I have been experiencing being in a hard place too and feeling like I am just going through the motions. I am confident that songs will be written out of what you have shared and I cannot wait to hear what the Lord gives you. Take care and thank you again.
This comment was posted on January 6, 2014 at 5:31 pmLove your honesty and sometimes the hardest part is admitting we aren’t perfect in a world where I often find I am striving for perfection even though I know it’s not possible.
Come, every soul by sin oppressed,
there’s mercy with the Lord;
and he will surely give you rest,
by trusting in his Word.
Sweet rest is often what we need when our minds choose to embrace and worry and fret and drive us down down down. I lift you up in prayer and am confident that our Savior will give you rest…
Beautifully stated…free falling is a scary business! We’ve had our share, from losing a house to an addicted child. Right now, it’s health issues. But, it’s all in hands that are much bigger and competent than mine.
God Bless, Shannon!
Oh,my…In my childhood I was wounded…deeply. It comes back. I turn to Him, He ministers. I feel better. I think the wound is healed. Then…something happens that triggers it. I wonder if I will ever be free of the searing soul pain that visits me. He is faithful. My trust is deepened in Him. There is a difference after all these years ~ somehow it’s not as bad as it used to be, not as scary. But, sometimes, it still feels as if I will not recover.
I know a depth of His love I would never have experienced if I had not been wounded and known Him as my Tender Healer. If I could choose to go back and have the hurts never happen, would I? I would have to give up all the memories of Him wiping my tears and speaking tenderly to my soul. Every so often I can see a time where I could be grateful for the pain. It’s not now but, I can see how I might. I used to ask why. Now I see those who hurt me in a different light. I have not arrived at the place where I have fully mature soul. Oh, no. I started out way behind, frighteningly so. I am grateful for growth and understanding. I relish the times when I know there is healing going on and He speaks tenderly to me.
shannon Reply:
January 7th, 2014 at 9:02 am
Dear Lynne…thank you, thank you, thank you for being willing to share a glimpse into your pain and your struggle toward healing. The irony of experiencing His love in more profound ways while having had to tread through such dark places is both confusing and comforting, as you shared….I have felt the same in my struggle. To know Him as a Tender Healer is irreplaceable, but the feeling of elusive recovery can be so disheartening at times. I am on a similar journey, and I will be lifting you up, my sister. Thank you, again, for your courage in sharing.
Lynne Reply:
January 9th, 2014 at 7:03 am
Thanks Shannon, I just had one of those hard times listening to a sermon by Pastor Lutzer on the radio. My father was an alcoholic and died when I was 8 yrs old.
In the sermon Dr Lutzer said we need to reconcile with our fathers. I started to cry because I miss him still. (I am in my 60’s) His death and subsequent absence still has an affect on me today.
The Lord knows why were born into the families we were born into. I am in a unique place to minister that I would not have been in had I been born into a Christian family.
Thank you for your music and sharing your tender heart!
LOVE YOU!!!! So totally moved by how God shines right through you. By how real you’ve always been. Feel God leading me to write (worship). Big stretching. Big healing.
shannon Reply:
January 7th, 2014 at 9:04 am
And I Love you, my friend! Wish I could’ve spent more time chatting with you when I was at FBC that weekend. But I basked in the a cappella carols! I loved your FB post about your sweet Dad. I’m sure you must miss his presence so much. What sweet memories to have. I pray the Lord gives you the strength, courage and inspiration to write these songs of healing He is birthing in you. Love you, Amy.
yes, like others have said, your transparency is so precious. Thank you for being that open with all of us. Trusting God to be there…trusting God to take that step off the step? So hard to get to that place. And like you have shared its so …wow…amazing…aweing…to realize He is still there. I’m feeling a bit of a desert time, perhaps a little burnout with going and doing and doing (even church/God stuff). But still i’m seeking, hungry for that NEXT thing that God has for me. That next step, next open door. Want to do for God you know? and still keep everything else in tact. Family, children, husbands, friendships all of it. thanks for offering this awesome giveaway. You are a blessing indeed!
shannon Reply:
January 7th, 2014 at 9:06 am
Thank you, Carol, for sharing part of your journey and struggle…and for your encouraging words! I pray He gives you sweet peace and rest during this season and that He brings refreshing to the dry places. Blessings to you in 2014!
Thank you for your honest transparency. You are such a blessing. Praying for you.
This comment was posted on January 6, 2014 at 8:54 pmShannon,
Thank you for sharing this. Can’t quite find the words to express how it touched me.
God Bless,
Cass Gianino
Crosspoint, St. Louis
Shannon,
I am so happy I read this. I’m sorry you’re in a valley. But He gives iron shoes for the rocky roads. I’m in the valley too, but it’s during these times (as you know) that our faith grows. Let’s believe that together. This is a note of friendship, not a note to make me eligible to win a CD. #butIwouldnthateyouifIdid
xoxo
shannon Reply:
January 7th, 2014 at 9:07 am
Sweet Sheryl…I guess we’re “valley girls” then, huh? I know you’ve been going through it too…let’s definitely be lifting each other up. Sending love from Colorado! -SW
Shannon Wexelbergs music ushers in Gids presence
This comment was posted on January 7, 2014 at 10:56 pmDearest Shannon,
I am sorry for the struggle you are journeying through right now. I wish we could visit over coffee and I could give you a friendly hug and smile. What a blessing it would be to me to extend just a bit of comfort and peace to you as you have for so many with your writing and singing. Thinking of you today and praying God’s comfort and peace surround you.
Thanku Shannon for your raw honesty. It encouraged me today. And The Lord knows my heart needed it. I’m not there yet– to free fall, but I wanna be
This comment was posted on January 21, 2014 at 10:26 amWorking on my recently Redeemed-to-Jesus mother’s final tax return, and wiping my repeatedly teared-up eyes, I put on “I Have a Song” CD.
A long-time divorced 65 year old woman, I have had a difficult 5 years with financial ruin and surgery after surgery, which led me to a lonely desert. I never would have believed a strong believer in Jesus could be in total darkness, but it did happen to me. After angrily questioning His existence (else why would I be in such darkness?) for 6-8 months, God gave a pinpoint of light, and I glommed on to it for dear life, and began my journey of learning to trust a God I didn’t even believe in anymore. Shaky and fearful, I could only ask God to hold onto me. I keep saying “Don’t let me go” – even just walking seems impossible.
So I come to today, and listening to This Is The Day, I was prompted to Google you, and came to your Jan 5 blog, “Free-Fall”. How God has used you today! I have such a pile of fears and worries to give to Him……This is the Day!!!
Dearest Shannon,
Praying for you as you journey through this difficult chapter; our faithful God will bring you through – these times in the furnace are lonely, painful, and sometimes seem like they will never end. You are anointed to sing His praises and touch His people — I have passed on your CDs to others traveling through the deep valleys and your voice and lyrics have sustained and encouraged them over and over– they make me weep as I worship our Lord. I will hold you up as our Lord does His work in your heart with His unending love —
Good morning Shannon,
You and I meet on a regular bases through your music. Thank you for sharing your gift of music. It has been balm of hope to me. My time with The Lord is so rich because of your music.
I to have been experiencing what you are describing. It has been an interesting ride. Fear, anxiety, depression. Coming at me from all areas of my life. I had looked for counciling but never could connect with the right person so I thought. I was seeking things in my own strength, I needed my spirit to connect to Gods Spirit, So then I asked The Lord , who should I see ? Or not see. Over the past few months God has put amazing resources in my path. I feel I’m on my way put of this dark path. I would like to share them with you, if that’s ok. O how I would rather be able to meet with you in person! You have helped me so much in this season of life! I wish I could return the blessing.
First I have to say that The Lord sustained me while figuring things out. Praise God!
1st..I had a good Christian Dr. Then as I asked The Lord what to do, great resources came my way. Anything.. Andrew Farley , The Hurt and the Healer was the first book of his I read, so good. Just Joy Ministries 21days to beat depression! Excellent!, learning about the joy of the Lord and how to apply it has been a God send. Learning about Gods rest and His peace and how to apply it in my life has been good too. Sometimes I feel like I have been on this journey a long long time but as I reflect back I see that God really has been with me the whole time even when I don’t feel like He is. My prayer for you as you go through this season ,is that you know there are many sisters in your corner, praying with you and for you and going through the same struggles . May God be glorified as we soldier on. God bless you Shannon, your music heals in broken places.
It is Thanksgiving morning 2014, sunrise…Arizona. So many blessings around us. Thank you for you for the music that acts to amplify the emotional connectivity and grace we have been given. Music..Shannon..acts as Gods Snowplow..it pushes out the internal build up..allows the light to deepen into us. Your being called to go back to Kauai. To find more ‘quiet places’ and write more music. Aloha..Hannelei Bay awaits..you left some music in your heart on your last visit back there. Time to come full circle..Aloha. Happy Thanksgiving. Matthew
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Margaret Hughes Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 3:27 pm
I think he is always trying to do something new in us. Especially what we think impossible. May we always know its Him, and He can. Im not as comfortable when he uses parts of me as I am when he does the totally miraculous. I think its a humility thing.
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shannon Reply:
January 5th, 2014 at 6:39 pm
You’re so right, Margaret….He is always working and doing a new thing. Lord, help us trust You in the process!
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